Whose Praise Matters?

When I was studying the Bible, this verse particularly caught my attention: “... a circumcision is circumcision of the heart, by the Spirit, not by the written code. Such a man’s praise is not from men, but from God.” (Romans 2:29) What’s the difference between being praised by God and being praised by man? Interestingly, what wins man’s praise is sharply in contrast with what wins God’s praise. You can’t blame man – he only praises you for what he sees!

Man’s praise is temporary – it is of no use when you get to heaven. It is of no value, except to make you feel good, for some time. People who praise you today may even turn against you later. So, you can't use man's praise to measure where you stand.

You would normally win man’s praise if you contribute a big sum to an orphanage or a church, pray long and loud prayers peppered with Scripture, recite a lot of verses from the Bible, lead praise and worship, perform miracles in the Name of Jesus, preach loud sermons interjected with “Hallelujah’s” and “Praise the Lord’s”, compose beautiful worship songs or write nice articles about your Christian walk. All these are good things to do. But, what would God find when He digs in deeper, where no one but He can see? Will He find a heart that is wholly devoted to Him? That’s what He desires to see and that’s what wins His praise. “The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (I Samuel 16:7b)

God refers to David as “a man after His own heart” (Acts 13:22). By man’s standards, David would probably be classed as an adulterer and a murderer. You don’t need an impressive record to win God’s praise, but you need to have a sincere heart. We read of many people who won God’s praise – the Canaanite woman (Matthew 15:28), the centurion (Luke 7:9), Moses (Deuteronomy 34:10-12) and many others. Let us be upright before God. Confess to Him your shortcomings, sins and struggles. That’s what pleases Him. (Luke 18:9-14)

At all times, let us examine ourselves to see if we live as those who will receive praise from God. A decision to increase my prayer time is good. But I need to check why I do it. Is it because I want to spend more time with this God I love or is it just to impress someone else or myself? More than what I do for Him, it is my heart that matters to Him – a life offered to Him as a pleasing sacrifice.

Before You Point Your Fingers...

“He’s a liar”
“She gossips a lot”
“Why can’t he be more patient?”
"Why does she have such a bad temper?”

At times, it is easier for us to point out the faults of others, but not so easy to see similar or worse faults in ourselves. King David has been there too. You’re asking “when”? Observe his response to prophet Nathan. The man who took the ewe lamb that belonged to a poor man deserves to die, whereas David himself can get away with murder and adultery. He burned in anger against this fictitious character (II Samuel 12:5), not realising that his own actions were worse. When David later realised his sin, he was quick to repent but he wished that the Lord would be gracious to him (II Samuel 12:22).

Often, we are gentle when dealing with our sins, but hard on others. We plead to God for mercy when we have sinned; but when someone else sins, we label them as a ‘sinner’. God hates it when we receive forgiveness but fail to forgive others. (Matthew 18:23 – 35) Jesus teaches us to treat others the way we ourselves would want to be treated. (Matthew 6:14,15; 7:2, 12) "... you who pass judgement on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgement do the same things." (Romans 2:1)

Now, don’t yet resolve that you will never again correct another person. That’s not what the Word of God teaches. “...first, take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:5) You can’t let that speck remain in your brother’s eye! You need to remove it, but only after you have removed the plank in your own eye.

This person had agreed to e-mail me something I had asked for, by Monday. It was Monday, but the e-mail didn’t come. I waited for a few more days. No e-mail still. I sent a reminder e-mail. No reply to that, either. Two weeks went by. I did not get the e-mail. “Now, that’s not right. How can this person promise to do something and not do it? Or, why not call me or send me a message saying that they couldn’t send it? Well, I am not angry with this person. But, I am ‘concerned’. Oh, this person must learn to keep a promise.” I was all set to talk to this person about obeying Matthew 5:37 (“Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘yes’, and your ‘no’, ‘no’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”) and Psalm 15:4b (“... who keeps his oath even when it hurts.”) I was quite prepared on what I wanted to say. I had been working on it for a few days, of course, with prayer. 

But, just before I could do this ‘talk’, God reminded me of the numerous times I had failed to keep my word! Now, that was scary. What could I do, but to simply count on His grace? There was a tremendous, almost instant, change in my attitude. Our discussion did happen. It turned out to be more helpful than accusatory. Only after the discussion did I come to know that e-mail was not this person’s preferred mode of communication.

The key is to focus on how merciful God has been to us. After all, Christ loves us sinners, sinless as He is!

When You Are Insulted...

A few years back, I attended a wedding. I went along with my college staff. As we were entering the church building, some lecturers were walking ahead of me, others behind me. Near the entrance was a gentleman who was distributing song sheets (with songs to be sung at the wedding). He handed song sheets to people entering the church. When it was my turn, I stretched my hand to receive one for myself as well. He paused, looked at me and asked “Can you sing?” If I had a ‘pride-o-meter’, the indicator would have shot up to the highest, for a moment. Meanwhile, this is what was going on in my mind: “I lead the college choir; I’ve been part of the All Souls’ Church choir; I lead worship. What made him think I can’t sing? Is he judging by looks?” One voice said, “Walk on without replying. It’s an insult! You only miss a song sheet.” The other voice said, “Who are you after all? Who gave you the gift of singing? Tell him you can sing. It is OK to be insulted.” After a moment of struggle, I chose to obey the latter voice. I calmly replied to him, “Yes, I can sing.” Again, I stretched my hand and this time, he gave me a song sheet.

It could seem like a very small thing. But, our response to such ‘small things’ matter a lot. Such situations actually reveal our true colours. I used to think I am humble enough. Only when put to test did I realise there is so much of pride in me! One of my favourite quotes: “Humility is a funny thing. The moment you think you’ve got it, you’ve lost it.” How true!

My definition of humility used to be “not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less.” If all I can think about is myself - me, my comfort, my problems, I have pride! Later I learnt this: “Humility is not thinking of yourself at all.” But, how can we possibly do that? If we are occupied with thinking about the interests of others (Philippians 2:4) and that of Christ Jesus (Philippians 2:21), we cannot be proud and selfish. That way, we won’t even think “I’ve become humble enough!”

Christ Himself is the perfect example of humility. It amazes me that being in very nature God, He did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. (Philippians 2:6,7)

He exhibited His humility by:

• Being born as a baby and becoming vulnerable 
• Being born in a manger, not in a palace 
• Being obedient to His earthly parents, though He was God 
• Talking to and feasting with ‘sinners’ 
• Obeying the laws of the land (He did not claim tax exemption because He was God!) 
• Being quiet when people called him ‘just a man’ and when people insulted Him 
• Not taking revenge against those who wanted to kill him 
• Relating to you and me and calling us His children! 

I could go on with the list....

May we be imitators of Christ and His attitude, of course, with His strength. Meekness is not weakness. In fact, it takes God's strength.

My Second Biggest Decision!!

It was a Wednesday night. When I was about to hit the bed after a long day at work, I got a call from my dad. It was quite unusual for him to call at that time. What was he going to say? He didn’t take too long to get to the point. There was a marriage proposal for me. The guy’s parents had heard about me from a common friend and they thought I would be a suitable life partner for him. That’s how it usually works in our culture -- arranged marriage, as it is called. My dad went on to say a little about him. His name is Daniel; he works with Infosys, and he is a spiritual person. My dad had spoken to me about other marriage proposals before. They didn’t work out for some reason or the other. So, I didn’t take it too seriously this time either. But I had to give him some answer. I said I would pray about it.

Then I quickly opened his Facebook profile on my phone. There wasn’t much activity on his Facebook page, but he had a profile picture. He was a guy with a pleasant face and curly long hair tied in a pony. Long hair? Hmmm... not exaclty my taste. I was not too sure what to think of him. But, I made a note of our one mutual friend and decided to talk to her. Then, I prayed that if this is the person I should marry, then it would happen; if not, I prayed that it would somehow be stopped. With that, I slept.

The next morning, my dad e-mailed me his picture. Well, in this one, he had short hair and a pleasant smiling face. I was hoping he has short hair now. I also reasoned that his profile picture on Facebook is probably not up to date, since he did not seem to be active on Facebook anyway. Then I called our mutual friend and asked her about Daniel. She said they were colleagues and he is a very nice person. Alright, that's good, but I can't make up my mind either way yet!

Soon, I got another call from dad and he asked if it would be fine for me to meet the person and talk to him on Saturday. What? In two more days? I was not sure I was ready for it. I had just heard his name for the first time yesterday! I could see that my parents were very excited about the marriage proposal. They had their reasons. The guy’s family had said that they would not take a dowry, which is traditionally a huge amount of money the bride’s family would have to pay the groom’s family at the time of marriage. That was proof that they are not money-minded people and they respect people for who they are. Finally, I agreed for our meeting on Saturday, because I didn't have a good reason to say no.

I did not yet have much reason to be as excited as my parents were, but I continued to pray. I had always thought that I would ask a lot of questions before I would agree to marry a guy. I wanted to find out everything about him before I would say “yes”. Here was my time to do what I had always wanted to do. Or was it? On Friday night, when I read my Bible, I came upon this verse in Philippians 2:3, 4: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests but also to the interests of others.” That struck me hard and realigned my perspective of marriage. I realized that marriage is not about finding someone who would fit into my expectations, but the process of me weaving into his life and being a part of God's kingdom together. That was a game changer for me. I decided not to take my notepad to the ‘interview’, after all. I would let him talk and see how it goes. My prayer was that at the end of the meeting, God would make it clear to me whether I should say ‘yes’ or ‘no’; there should be no ambiguity. By the time I finished praying, I had great peace.

After a restful sleep on Friday night, Saturday morning dawned with an air of anticipation. My parents, my aunt and I drove to a friend’s house, where we had agreed to meet. After a few minutes, the guy and his parents arrived too. I was relieved to see his short hair! Then, they said Daniel and I could talk in privacy and get to know each other. Sure enough, he took the lead. The first thing he said was, "Would you pray?" I was quite impressed! Wow, a man who puts God first. Then we went on to talk about our interests, jobs, values, and common friends. It turned out that we had lot more common friends than the one listed on Facebook. After a casual chat of about 15 minutes, we walked out of the room and went to where our parents were getting acquainted. I took a seat next to my mom, and she whispered to me, “Do you like him?” I said “yes”. As soon as I did, I looked over and I saw Daniel nodding a yes to his parents as well.

Wait, had I just made a life-changing decision? Yes, I had. I barely knew anything about Daniel. But I made up my mind to love him no matter what. After all, love is a decision more than an emotion. After a couple of months of courting, I pronounced at the altar, “I Do.”

Now, considering how long Daniel takes to decide, even to buy a tie, I tell him, “the quickest decision you’ve ever made is to say ‘yes’ to me”. That’s the day we met – 4th of June, 2011. And the Lord who united us continues to guide us and hold us.

Now, if you are wondering what my first biggest decision is, you can read all about it here.

Praying Rather than Preaching

Once, my parents called me over phone and shared a problem they were going through. I quickly recollected all Bible verses I knew that would apply to their situation. I preached a short sermon to my mom, and then another sermon to my dad and then hung up. As if this were not enough, I typed out another long sermon, sent it over e-mail and asked my parents to check their mailbox. They seemed the least interested in any of this. I wonder if they even read till the end of my e-mail! Frustrated, finally, I went to the Presence of the Almighty and told Him that nothing has worked out. “So, God, you take care of it.” Soon after that, I could see a positive change, not only in my parents but also in me. I no longer thought “I have to do something about it”, because I’ve casted my burden on Him! Then I realised, what they now need is not a sermon, but someone who would listen. My action at that time was contrary to James 1:19 (“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”) They just need the strength to apply the verses they already know.

That’s not the only time I did this. I love to preach to people, especially when I myself have encountered a situation similar to the one the other person is in. It is often easy to preach than to listen patiently and pray.

Often, preaching in the wrong situations only make things worse. Well, I am not against ‘preaching’. Jesus did preach; Paul preached; so do many contemporary preachers. Their sermons, for sure, do not dissolve in the air. The difference is – knowing where to preach and where to pray. Jesus knew when to tell stories, when to ask questions, when to preach, when to pray, when to perform miracles; He also knew when to remain quiet. When Jesus foretold Simon Peter’s denial, He did not preach a sermon on standing firm in the faith. Rather, He said: “...but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail.” (Luke 22:32)

In another instance, someone (say ‘Z’) did something I did not like. I was tempted to make a sarcastic comment, which I knew would hurt ‘Z’. Saying that would only result in a bitter argument. I was waiting to tell ‘Z’ that I did not like what ‘Z’ did. At that time, God reminded me that I had not yet prayed about it. “Oh yes, God! Take care of it.” I prayed and with God’s strength, refrained from making that comment and even saying anything about it. A few days later, when I was talking to ‘Z’, this topic came up and I was able to convey what I wanted to, in a non-threatening way. This time, I was helping, not hurting! That’s what the Spirit of God does. After this incident, I was all excited and I was singing:

“What a friend we have in Jesus

All our sins and griefs to bear

What a privilege to carry

Everything to God in prayer

Oh what peace we often forfeit

Oh what needless pain we bear

All because we do not carry

Everything to God in prayer.”

Philippians 4:6, 7 – “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus”). ‘Anything’ and ‘every situation’ includes others’ struggles as well!

Bus without a conductor

Last weekend, I was flipping through the pages of my husband’s old journal. No, I was not sneaking... He was sitting right next to me J. I was reading in random. One of the journal entries caught my attention. This one was about a bus without a conductor. I was particularly fascinated because I’ve never been in one. However, as a kid, I used to imagine what would happen if the bus leaves before the conductor boards the bus.

My husband used to commute to office by bus. That morning, he had boarded the public bus at the busstand, to get to his office – close to 1.5 hours of travel ahead. Driver got into the bus, started it and drove a few kilometres, without realising the conductor hadn’t boarded the bus. After a while, the passengers from the back of the bus started shouting to the driver that there was no conductor! Baffled (probably also embarrassed), the driver stopped the bus, asked the passengers to get down and take a different bus to their respective destinations. He must have driven back to the busstand or waited there for the conductor to come! What more can be done in a bus without a conductor?

How often, we act like we don’t need anyone to run our lives! We think we can direct our own lives. Like a bus without a conductor can’t fulfil its purpose, life without Christ (Who is the very purpose of our living) cannot fulfil its purpose.

“... all things were created by Him and for Him” (Colossians 1:16b)

Looking for Signs?

It was a moment of ecstasy for King Solomon. “He returned to Jerusalem, stood before the ark of the Lord’s covenant and sacrificed burnt offerings and fellowship offerings. Then he gave a feast for all his court.” (I Kings 3:15b) Who wouldn’t be delighted after such an encounter with God? God appears to Solomon in a dream and asks him what he wants. You would know the rest of the story. Solomon asks God for wisdom. God is pleased with his request and grants him not only wisdom, but also riches and honour. (I Kings 3:5 – 15) Don’t we wish something similar would happen to us? We all like to experience God in a supernatural way. Of course, God does reveal Himself supernaturally to specific people in specific circumstances. Based on what? We do not know. But, it would be a mistake to measure ‘our righteousness’ based on such experiences. It is wrong to think “because I did something good, God gives me visions.”

Moreover, supernatural experiences do not guarantee obedience. “The Lord became angry with Solomon because his heart was turned away from the Lord, the God of Israel, who had appeared to him twice.” (I Kings 11:9). Or take the example of the Israelites. They rebelled against God though they witnessed miracles every day of their journey to the Promised Land.

The rich man about whom we read in Luke 16:19 – 31 thought his brothers would repent if someone from the dead tells them the Gospel. But he was wrong! “If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets, they will not be convinced even if someone rises from the dead.” (vs. 31) All that we need to know are already revealed in the Word of God!

Others look for signs and wonders to test God. We know Jesus’ reply to that: “A wicked and adulterous generation looks for a miraculous sign, but none will be given it except the sign of Jonah.” (Matthew 16:4a)

Paul describes his supernatural experiences in II Corinthians 12:1-5. But, he chooses to boast in his weakness rather than in visions and revelations.

It is good to have supernatural experiences. But, our basis remains the Word of God and obeying His commands. “Blessed rather are those who hear the Word of God and obey it.” (Luke 11:28)